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I’m a hugger … not a shaker. March 31, 2010

Posted by schlanghole in Uncategorized.

I consider myself a personable guy and I am a hugger. I like to hug. I’ve always been that way. When I see my friends out, I welcome them with a hug. Family friends, girl friends, guy friends, old people, young people, bald people, hairy people. It doesn’t matter. Sometimes even when introduced to someone for the first time, I will give them a hug.

But lately I’ve been thinking I need to reign it in a bit.

I know certain people are not huggers and by invading their space I’m making them uncomfortable. I don’t want to make people uncomfortable. So lately I’ve been trying a new approach. I have been “backing off” and trying the old stand-by handshake. The problem I’ve noticed however is that it might be too late. When people see me coming they expect the hug and prepare themselves for it whether they like it or not.

For example, the other day I saw a buddy who I know is NOT a hugger but I’ve been hugging him for years. I tried my new approach and attempted to stick my hand out instead but it was too late. He was already coming in for the hug. And it was … awkward.

I guess I’m at a hugging crossroads. I’m not sure if I should continue trying to convert my hugs to handshakes or embrace (pun intended) my instincts to hug regardless of whom I creep out.

So here is my message to you. If you’re not a hugger and I bump into you in the near future, give me a sign. I won’t be offended. If you don’t … I’ll assume I have a green light and will be coming in for my hug.



1. MFMG aka Matt Green - March 31, 2010

I say, go on with the hugging. It’s what you do. Maybe you can be a little more selective about going in for the kill with someone you meet for the first time. Or, maybe if they are with others that know you, they will see you hug your friends and you can “feel them out” before diving in. I have a friend (guy) who is a hugger. I’ve come to expect that from him. He’s a sentimental kind of guy and I would feel weird if he stopped doing it. I would wonder what’s wrong. Don’t doubt yourself, I think it’s cool that you’re a hugger. A handshake can be sincere, but never as sincere as a good solid hug.

2. shannon - March 31, 2010

I’m all for being a hugger!! Life is short….be who you are….if you were here I’d give you a hug!!!

3. chad - March 31, 2010

Gotta be true to yourself Tony. And you have to let people accept (or reject) you for your truth. Otherwise you’re just faking it. And you sir are not a faker. Go with the hugs!

4. JasonWilliamz - March 31, 2010

The hugs are good, its that reach around that makes me blush.
Just sayin……

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