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The Case of the Missing Bat: A Timeline July 11, 2010

Posted by schlanghole in Red Sox.
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What is this Bat?

Those who know me know that I am a huge Boston Red Sox fan.

I became a Red Sox fan 30+ years ago when I was 10’ish years old living in Connecticut. Connecticut is between New York and Massachusetts and there is an invisible line separating the state. The southern half of the state roots for the Yankees while the northern section is all Red Sox. We lived fairly south of the “border” so all of my friends and most of my family were Yankee fans. I instead decided to root for the good guys and devoted my allegiance to the Sox.

A big reason I rooted for the Red Sox was because it seemed like they were always the underdog and were more of a “working mans” team. They played hard, played hurt, and got dirty. Some of my favorite players back then were Yastrzemski, Fisk, Rice, Lynn, Burleson, Evans, Tiant, Stanley, Lee, and Eckersley.

Throughout the years my favorite players for Boston have always fit this same mold. A more recent player was named Trot Nixon. Trot played right field for the Sox from 1996-2006 and played hard. He was considered the inspiration for the expression “Boston Dirt Dogs”. His signature was that of a “scrapper” and one who hustled and wasn’t afraid to get himself dirty to win the game. I loved watching him play.

Six years ago I attended a Treasure Valley little league fund raiser hosted by Bill Buckner (another infamous Red Sox player who I’ve had the pleasure to spend some time with). At the fund raiser was a silent auction with a variety of sports memorabilia. I bid on several items throughout the night and ended up leaving the proud owner of a shiny black bat signed by Trot Nixon.

Now, over the years I have collected much Red Sox paraphernalia and a while ago my wife “encouraged” me to instead of displaying my collection at our home, that it would be better appreciated in my office. So, over the years, this is where the bulk of my collection has resided including the bat, which over time has affectionately been labeled as simply “Trot”.

I am so fortunate to work at one of the coolest companies I’ve ever known called Wirestone. We are a digital marketing agency and I currently serve as the COO for the company and the Managing Director of our Boise office.

While roaming the halls it is not uncommon to see me carrying “Trot” around. When interviewing prospective new “Wirestoners” I typically have Trot in my hands. Every couple weeks or so I host a forum where I address the office staff, updating them on the latest news around the company. During these forums you will always find me holding Trot. When I am traveling or out of the office for an extended period of time, I present Trot to whomever I leave in charge. Trot has, in some ways, become a symbol of my authority.

That is until recently …

Trots Kidnapping: A Timeline

May 21, 2010

Those who know me also know that I am a big believer in the power of social media and I engage heavily, especially on Twitter. On this day I got a new Twitter follower. Their handle is @WEHAVEYOURBAT. Now I am not the kind-of guy who instantly follows back everyone who follows me unless we have similar interests like baseball, history, digital marketing, travel, antiquities, Boise, etc. I’m pretty consistent with new followers. I always read their bios and always check out their latest tweets to see if they might be interesting and someone I should follow back.

I checked out @WEHAVEYOURBAT’s bio:

And their Twitter avatar:

And on this day, they only had one tweet:

“We will no longer stand idle while innocent bats suffer in the hands of little leaguers, over-paid athletes, & fanboys. Exitus acta probat.”

Based on the info I saw, I decided not to follow them back and moved on.

June 1, 2010

I received the following message:

@Schlanghole: You should pay closer attention to who is following you! http://twitpic.com/1t6daf

The message was rather mysterious and I clicked on the link, which revealed this photo.

It was Trot! I furrowed my brow and thought “what the hell?” Immediately I started looking around my office for Trot. It was not there. I scoured our entire floor. Couldn’t find it. I went to my buddy and Boise Technical Functional Manager Mike Higgins (@higgorama) office to ask him about Trot. I had travelled recently leaving Mike in charge and presented Trot to him prior to my departure. He turned to look behind him and said, motioning to a corner of his office, “Dude. Last I saw it, it was right there.”

I went back to my laptop and replied:


In which I received this answer:

@Schlanghole: Glad we have your attention. “Trot” is safe… for now.

I started looking closer into @WEHAVEYOURBAT’s profile to see if there were any additional information or clues. They were following only two other people other than myself … @healter_skelter and @TheodoreBundy.

I laughed.

June 7, 2010

After a long wait, I received the next message, which was a link to another photo:

@Schlanghole: http://twitpic.com/1ure2f

It was Trot again but this time surrounded by a bunch of Yankee paraphernalia! Now that’s low. Yucky even. As I examined the photo closer I noticed that some of the Yankee photos included past Yankee players, not all current. I am still not convinced that @WEHAVEYOURBAT is a Yankee fan based on this shot.

Through my posts, people become interested throughout the office and on Twitter. They offer to start helping me solve the #BatMystery. One thing I learned to do is check GPS coordinates of each photo. The first photo had none. The second photo? It’s GPS coordinates suggested the photo was taken inside my house!

Later that day I received three Direct Messages:

@WEHAVEYOURBAT: RULE #1: All demands MUST be followed to the letter


@WEHAVEYOURBAT: RULE #2: All actions on your part must be swift and genuine


@WEHAVEYOURBAT: RULE #3: If rules 1 & 2 are not followed, bad things happen


June 8, 2010

In the afternoon I received the following DM:

@WEHAVEYOURBAT: DEMAND #1: Over the next week you must denounce your beloved #RedSox and baseball entirely via twitter. #dontforgettherules

First of all … Demand #1? This implied that there would be others. Second of all … were they serious? Denounce the Red Sox and baseball entirely? Via Twitter? Now Trot is certainly special to me but, let’s face it, it’s just a bat. It’s not as important as my allegiance to the Red Sox. I knew right away I would not, could not, comply and said so in several tweets back to @WEHAVEYOURBAT. They would not engage further or discuss possible “alternative” demands.

June 10, 2010

This morning I received a link to a Drop Box hosted site, which was running a countdown clock. If I did not comply before the time was up, “bad things happen”. Scattered throughout the source code were messages such as “we’re watching you”, “don’t forget the rules”. The countdown gave me until midnight of June 14 to comply.

At this point, I am suspicious of everyone. No one is off limits. Coincidentally, a few days prior to these events unfolding, I had hosted a management summit in Boise. This meant I needed to add 15+ additional out of town Wirestoner suspects to the list.

June 11, 2010

This morning I received this:

@Schlanghole: Numbers 30:1-2

I am not a religious guy but figured out it was a passage from the bible, which translates roughly to:

1 Moses said to the heads of the tribes of Israel: “This is what the LORD commands: 2 When a man makes a vow to the LORD or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.

Bible verses? Kind-of creepy. I need more clues. I tweet to everyone who will listen that there is a “reward for the safe return of Trot and any information leading to the capture of those found guilty”.

I send several messages to @WEHAVEYOURBAT in hopes of engaging in a dialog. I ask for “proof of life” before I comply with any demands. That evening I received the following message:

@Schlanghole: Proof of life http://twitpic.com/1w09cd

A photo of Trot sitting on top of a Chicago Tribune paper with that days date. Perhaps trying to set up one of my Chicago colleagues? The GPS coordinates for the photo … the Wirestone Chicago office.

June 15, 2010

Time is up. At exactly 12:01am I receive the next tweet:

@Schlanghole: Rules #1 and #2 were not followed. Rule #3 must be enforced. http://bit.ly/9YGq3C

Check it out. It is a link to a very creepy video of a bat-obsessed heavy-breather who proceeds to touch Trot inappropriately then starts up a chainsaw directing it toward Trot. The video ends at the moment of torture.

Now, I’ve got to say, I laughed. I’m not sure if that was the appropriate response or not but, damn. This is getting good! I’ve watched the video over and over and over again. There are a couple clues but, overall, pretty damn clean.

By this time, with the assistance of some very smart secret agents, we have created an evidence board containing profile, timeline, facts, and suspects. The problem? Still too many suspects and not enough info. @WEHAVEYOURBAT has been very careful not to leave behind too many clues.

June 16, 2010

I arrive at the office and sitting on my desk, inside my baseball glove, is a package for me. I already suspect what it is and I am right:

It is supposedly the bottom nub of Trot with some sawdust leftovers from the act of sawing. So this tells me a few things. The suspect has access to my office. The night before I had left for home around 6:30-7:00. And as I am accustomed to doing, I did a sweep through the office prior to leaving to see who was still working. There were only a handful of people still working that night all of which were now added to the suspect list. At this point I am not sleeping very well. Instead of my suspect list condensing, it is expanding. I fly to Virginia for a wedding the next morning.

June 18, 2010

While sitting by my Uncle-in-law’s pool in Virginia I receive in quick succession three more messages (bible passages) from @WEHAVEYOURBAT. I have provided their translations below.

@Schlanghole: Isaiah 53:11

“After the suffering of his soul, he will see the light [of life] and be satisfied; by his knowledge my righteous servant will justify many, and he will bear their iniquities.”

@Schlanghole: Matthew 7:15

“Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves.”

@Schlanghole: Mark 13:22

“For false Christs and false prophets will appear and perform signs and miracles to deceive the elect–if that were possible.”

I could write pages on my interpretation of these passages but will instead let you make your own.

June 22, 2010

Today I learn (through the help of my colleague Roxanne’s sister) I have an invite to have dinner 3-days from now in San Francisco with Roxanne, her sister Teresa, and Mrs. Jackie Francona who is married to Terry Francona, the Manager of the Boston Red Sox. Following dinner I am invited to join the group at the game using tickets left for us by “Tito” Francona. Are you kidding me? I am thrilled. Dinner and a game with Red Sox insiders! I am so excited and hurriedly make my flight, car, and hotel arrangements.

June 23, 2010

I receive the following message from @WEHAVEYOURBAT:

@Schlanghole: You can end the suffering. Your future actions will set the course for what happens next. http://twitpic.com/1zexd7

It is a picture of Trot this time without its bottom “nub”. If this photo is manipulated, it is a very good job indeed. I know lots of talented Photoshop gurus and can only assume that it is a doctored photo.

The photos GPS coordinates? AT&T Park, home of the San Francisco Giants where I would be going in two days.

June 25, 2010

I arrive in San Francisco without incident and prepare for dinner and the game. I’m always excited to go to a Red Sox game but this one is special given my opportunity to meet Mrs. Francona. She, along with her daughter, Roxanne, Teresa and Teresa’s husband David all join me for dinner across the street from the stadium. Everyone is very nice and it’s fun asking Mrs. Francona some questions about the Sox, particularly about “Tito” and their relationship. It turns out they met while going to college in Arizona and have been together throughout his career. She and her daughter both were so nice to me and we had a lovely time throughout dinner and the game (even though the Sox lost the game and lost Pedroia who broke his foot off a foul ball). We talked about several past and current players. A current favorite player we are both excited about is Daniel Nava. He’s a rookie with a couple great stories. She shared a couple with me and I with her.

At some point during the evening, Roxanne asked me to tell the Bat Mystery story. Mrs. Francona found it very funny and during the game elbowed me and said “How freaked out would you be if a photo of your bat appeared on the big jumbo tron?” I laughed but didn’t put it past @WEHAVEYOURBAT to make that happen. For the rest of the night I kept one eye on that screen.

After saying our farewells I walked back (via cloud nine) to my hotel room. Waiting for me on my nightstand was a UPS package.

Inside it was another package addressed to the hotel front desk.

Inside it was a third package and an envelope addressed to the front desk.

Inside the envelope was the following note.

Inside the third package was another piece of Trot.

Initially I thought, “Well played sir.” Even though the front desk had not complied exactly as instructed. I also thought this must narrow down the suspects because only a small handful of people knew where I was staying. Until I went back through my Twitter timeline and realized that, yes, I had tweeted to one of my followers where I would be staying (doh!). Then, just when I was about to put all away for the night, I examined the UPS package a little closer and at the bottom, in small type, was a “Reference: From …” line:

Lee Scott! Lee had to this point been a leading suspect. He has all the necessary qualifications and I had previously accused him in front of a group of people. I thought I had solved the case! I even tweeted to @WEHAVEYOURBAT that I knew who he was and that I would give him an opportunity to confess prior to announcing my findings … but then a thought occurred to me.

After all the careful planning @WEHAVEYOURBAT had done to this point to cover their tracks, leaving behind very little evidence, they make this bonehead mistake? They put their trust in a hotel front desk employee to do as instructed? It started to seem a little too obvious and smelled like yet another set-up.

Perhaps I am over thinking it and Lee is indeed @WEHAVEYOURBAT.

But wait … there’s more.

June 28, 2010

Back in the office on Monday morning I receive this message from @WEHAVEYOURBAT.

@Schlanghole: Wht u perceive, your obsrvations, feelings, interpretations, r all your truth. Your truth is important. Yet it’s not The Truth.

Is it an answer to my tweet claiming to know who they were and that I had solved the case? Is it a message from Lee Scott trying to cover his blunder and throw me off the trail?

I’m still not sure but what happened next made the hair on my arms stand up.

Waiting for me that Monday morning was yet another package mailed to me from Los Angeles.

Inside the package was the book titled “Bat Boy” written by author Matthew McGough.

Also inside the package was a Batman postcard.

On the back side was written this:

It reads: “Have you ever seen the damage a bat stretcher can do? Spare yourself – comply with the demands!”

I thought, “OK. That’s clever. @WEHAVEYOURBAT scoured Amazon.com and found a book titled Bat Boy and sent it to me.” Investigating further I google mapped the return address on the package and, indeed, it maps back to the residence of Matthew McGough’s home in L.A.

It was a Monday. I have many scheduled conference calls and while attending one I read the back cover of the book. It is about the authors experience of not just being a bat boy in MLB. But being the bat boy for none other than the New York Yankees. Not only that, on his first day “… he was greeted by none other than his idol, Don Mattingly – who promptly played a prank on him.”

A prank? This whole Bat Mystery is a prank. That is an eerie coincidence. I have currently started reading the book and hope it somehow provides some additional clues. But that’s not the part that made my hair stand on end.

I started flipping through the book and noticed there was an inscription:

It reads (in the same handwriting as the postcard): “Tony – Notwithstanding the circumstances, and your allegiance to the Red Sox, I hope you enjoy the book! Best wishes …” and a signature that I can only assume is meant to be the authors.

Next I google Mr. McGough’s name and find his official website at http://matthewmcgough.com/. I click through a couple pages and learn a bit more about him. Included on his site are a couple social links including his Twitter page. I think, “Great. I’ll start following him and see if I can find anything out.” I launch his Twitter page and discover I am already following him and he is following me! What? Apparently he had started following me a little while back, I had read his profile, it mentioned “Bat Boy” and I had followed him back. I search to see who in common we each are following or is following us and there is only one other common name … @WEHAVEYOURBAT.

I could not believe it. How in the hell did @WEHAVEYOURBAT rope, convince, persuade this author to join in on the mystery? Very impressive. I immediately tweeted Mr. McGough (@mttymcg) the following:

@mttymcg: Just wanted to say Thanks for the book you sent me. I returned from game over the weekend & it was waiting for me on my desk.

His reply:

@Schlanghole: You’re welcome Tony! Hope you’re able to find your bat soon. Until then: let’s go Yankees!!! #BatMystery

I’ve since tried to pump him for info to no avail although we have exchanged several tweets.

And finally, the latest development.

June 30, 2010

My wife and I attend the Shakespeare Festival plays here in Boise every year. On this evening we went to see A Midsummer Night’s Dream. We went with my sister-in-law Jenny and friends Holly Sue, Will, and Tim and Susan Nichols. Before the play begins there is always a Green Show, which is performed by the “Fools Squad” duo of Tom Willmorth and Joe Golden. The play started as usual after the Green Show. The plays always have two acts allowing for an intermission between. During the intermission our group was drinking some wine and hanging out in our seats. Soon I felt two hands on both of my shoulders. I went to turn around and heard “Tony, don’t turn around.” Which I did anyway and grasping me were none other than both Tom and Joe of the Fools Squad. They said they were instructed to deliver an item to me.

Yes. A shirt advertising another play being performed at the Festival titled “Bat Boy”. They said something else like “Do the right thing.” And promptly left.

I was floored. Now, when attending these plays we sit in fancy-schmancy box seats and there are six of us. So, unlike the rest of the seats at the outdoor theatre, ours are not assigned. There were three of us boys sitting in that box. The Fools Squad could have found out which box I was in but someone had to point me out to them. In addition, I had told very few people I was going to the play that evening but I did, of course, tweet I was there (doh!). However, I had tweeted just as the show was starting leaving very little time to arrange this. Another interesting fact … the character displayed on the shirt is the exact same character that is @WEHAVEYOURBAT’s Twitter avatar. Coincidence? I don’t know. What I do know is I am scheduled to go watch Bat Boy later this month.


Lee Scott: For the obvious reason of his name being on the UPS label as the “sender”. In addition to having all the skill sets needed to pull this off and being extremely creative, Lee is a big Drop Box user which is where the countdown clock was hosted.

Scott Surber: Always a suspect in any prank and very high on this list. He was also one of the handful of people working late the night before the “sawdust” package was delivered in my office.

Alex Couey & Darnell Weightman: Both past Wirestone interns. A source recently shared with me that they were cooking up some sort of prank prior to their departure.

Mike Higgins: He was the last one to have the bat. He also informed me that I should check out the GPS data attached to the photos.

Wirestone Executive Team: We’ve been known to pull pranks on each other and I wouldn’t put it past these guys to gang up on me. Top of this teams list is President Dan Lynch, Managing Director of our Chicago office, Paul Marobella, Managing Director of our Ft. Collins office, Ti Bensen, and Managing Director of Corporate Development, Christopher Rowlison.

Holly Sue Kerns: I played a pretty elaborate April Fools joke on her about 8 years ago and she has always promised to retaliate. Plus, she was at the Shakespeare Festival with us.

Tim Cox & Justin Sterling: Both these guys, one a semi-Yankee fan the other hard-core, pulled a prank on me 5+ years ago that included a different bat.

Craig Sweigart: The last known photo of Trot is of Craig carrying it around while on a conference call in the office. Plus, he’s been acting extra suspicious.

Alex Oyler & Chris Beaudoin: Two of our motion guys who are both clever and have all the abilities necessary to carry this out.

Paul Carew: One of my best friends … which automatically makes him a suspect. Extremely talented and someone with more than enough resources and abilities to put him on the list. Plus I think he’s still sore over the Cat Fish prank Kelly Cross and I pulled on him.

Tim Nichols: Also with us the night of Shakespeare. A creative leader in our city so, capable of this plot. In addition, he had me tell the story to his wife Susan who “claimed” not to know anything about it even though a source informed me later that she indeed knew about the Bat Mystery prior to that evening.

Rob Palmer: Another good friend who has more than enough chops to see this through. In addition, since taking a Creative Director position for RazorFish, he’s gone dark on me even after repeated text messages.

Brad Mitchell & Brie Bolopue: Two of the people probably closest to me on a daily basis. Have to put them on the list.

Jamie Cooper: Of Drake Cooper fame. Has more than enough resources at his disposal. He’s on the list because, although he might not know I saw him, he was at Shakespeare Festival and directly after receiving the Bat Boy shirt, the Fools Squad immediately went up and sat next to him.

Richard and Jaycob Schlangen: My brother and nephew. On the list because they have been Yankee thorns in my side their whole lives.


It is still going on. Some have counseled that I should quit Tweeting. They believe I’m giving up too much information to use against me.

I disagree. Don’t tell @WEHAVEYOURBAT because it might encourage them but, I’m enjoying the chase.

As you can see by the suspect list above, I am clueless.

Want to help me solve the mystery? Well jump on board. I can use all the help I can get.

@WEHAVEYOURBAT has been suspiciously quiet this last week. I’m not sure what to expect next and am these days constantly looking over my shoulder wondering when the next act will unfold.

Maybe that’s been @WEHAVEYOURBAT’s plan all along.